Paula\’s Palace of Thought

Dear Santa,

This is not a Christmas letter or list. I am not explaining why I should be on the “good list.” It has come to my attention that you are morbidly obese. For a man your age and size, you must suffer from a number of health problem. I know it is rude to comment on someone’s weight, but Santa, have you stepped on a scale lately? Where do I begin? High blood pressure and cholesterol must be serious concerns in your everyday life. Type II Diabetes should be something you suffer from. I am pretty sure you do not eat sugar-free cookies. Mrs. Clause is certainly putting too much sodium in your diet. I don’t even want to know how clogged your arteries are. What does your doctor think? How long have you had an eating disorder? I do not want you to revert to anorexia, but when the holiday season comes around it is pretty obvious you become a binge eater. You probably do not eat for days, then on Christmas Eve you go on a binge craze! Binge Eating is not the answer to your weight issues. Eating billions of cookies in one serving can’t be good for your body, especially all that sugar rotting your teeth!

Santa there are some simple ways to get your life back together. Try eating less carbs and sugars. An apple or carrot can do a lot of wonders. Run with Rudolph or Donner (start out as a nice walk). Go on fun dates with Mrs. Clause. I know you are quite busy watching all the children, but if you love your job, take into account your health!

Love and Concerned,

Paula

P.S. I will leave you an apple with a glass of water. Milk can have a lot of fat.  And your cheeks are quite rosy! Wear some sun screen to protect your face from the harsh winds of the North Pole!